Posts tagged: faq

asks:
My love has a really, really tight asshole, and we've tried getting into the whole prostate massage thing, but it's seriously so tight that I can barely get a single finger in there. Do you have any advice for some simple stretching for a first-timer?

My recommendation is that he experiment alone.  He needs to get a very thin, smooth vibrator or dildo and masturbate with it and experiment by himself so that he can learn his own limits.  If he can’t progress much further than a finger, he may just be too uncomfortable with the idea or his own body.  The two sphincters in the anal area can stretch an enormous amount, far more than most people would even think, but since we have both conscious and unconscious control over that area it is not always easy to relax enough to allow penetration.  Ask a professional therapeutic masseuse and they will tell you that we carry a LOT of stress in that area as well.

That’s about the best advice I can offer.

xxxplayground:

So true ^^

So what happened here?  Why did it get re-posted instead of reblogged from my site?  I guess I should just be happy it’s the most recent revision and that my site tag is still intact.  I’ve seen copies where it was removed. 
:-P

xxxplayground:

So true ^^

So what happened here?  Why did it get re-posted instead of reblogged from my site?  I guess I should just be happy it’s the most recent revision and that my site tag is still intact.  I’ve seen copies where it was removed. 

:-P

Anonymous
asks:
Do women really like this? What's in it for them? Doesn't it make our wives feel a little insecure? Women want strong men to be their protectors but if they are bending over and taking it like a women, isn't that in some way a little unnerving?

Are you from 1955?  Do you have such a narrow view of people, sexuality and gender roles?

Do women really like this?

I’m not a woman but I have a ton of female followers and I can safely say, without controversy, that YES, THEY DO.  All women? No.  But, broad statements about what all women want rarely pan out to be true.  Which brings me to…

Women want strong men to be their protectors

That assumes you know what all, or most women want.  It also assumes that pegging somehow negates that.

Doesn’t it make our wives feel a little insecure?

Since you wrote ‘wives’, I’ll address the question from that perspective. Aren’t marriages supposed to be based on trust, communication, understanding and love?  We all have our insecurities, but why would anyone be insecure for or about another person?  A woman, secure in herself, her marriage and her love for her mate, wouldn’t feel insecure about pegging, I don’t believe.  A man, secure in himself and his place in the world or his marriage/relationship wouldn’t need to ask that question either.

bending over and taking it like a women, isn’t that in some way a little unnerving?

Yes, almost certainly, that would be unnerving for some people.  I strongly suggest you modify that approach to fit your own needs.  For example: Try bending over and taking it like a man.

Your comments come from an older set of sensibilities that are falling by the wayside.  The concept of the “New Alpha Male” pisses off a lot of people who think like that, because they see it as the feminization of men. Along with the new wave geeks and nerds winning over the jocks, (..which has happened, look around; We won.) comes a new definition of “Alpha” that does not include the older ideas of dominance and suppression.  The “New Alpha” is about embracing yourself and the world around you without trying to force it, OR YOURSELF, to conform to a set of ‘norms’.  It’s about having confidence, honesty/integrity, tolerance/flexibility, humility and the skills to communicate with others without trying to drown them out.  This definition can apply to men and women and none of it has anything to do with pegging that I can tell.

Sorry if this came off as a little harsh, but I’m not just addressing you, Anon, with these comments.  I’m addressing a lot of people.  Also, I know that there are tons of people who do not agree.  If you want to have a conversation about it, fine, drop a line. If you want to shout angrily about it, then you have an equal opportunity on your tumblr.  Rant away.

There is one question that I can’t answer very well without recalling things said or written to me, by women and that wouldn’t do their perspective justice.

What’s in it for them?

That’s an easy question to get an answer to though; All you have to do is ask them.

Anonymous
asks:
if I have hemorrhoids "Class A" do I can practice pegging?

I think you mean “Type 1”.  At least here in the U.S. there is type 1-4 and they are internal or external.

The best answer I can give you is to talk to your doctor.  I know you may not want to but you REALLY should. 

You can probably still enjoy pegging though.  If you don’t have a lot of day-to-day pain and discomfort you should be fine.  I recommend

LOTS of lube,

a smooth surface dildo, like the Tantus Silk,

starting small then maybe medium size,

and going very slow. 

You should also explore on your own first, without a partner.

Anonymous
asks:
How can you tell if a man will be willing to try pegging?

Check for dildos in the butt.  That’s a dead give-away.

Also, change “she” to “he” in this post.  tl;dr There is no “tell” that you can pick up on.  TALK TO HIM.  That’s a pretty good start.